HAPPY Thanksgiving

"Here my dear, take these pills ;and you'll get well. (In heaven or hell? I thought to myself...

Courtesy: Photobucket

(PORTLAND, Ore.) - I'm thankful that you don't have to eat hospital food on Thanksgiving. In that you and every other tax payer paid for it, I thought I would share my first experience with mis-managed health care in America.

My Two days in a Medicaid Prison.

I passed out after a long hot get-over-my-cold bath last week. I called my new  "primary care" doc whom I've seen only once for less than 3 minutes - and left a message with his "medical assistant". A day later she returned my phone call and left a message on my machine, telling me to go to the hospital and I did.

 Day one, all kinds of tests, and an overnight stay waiting for a doc to review the result. I was awakened every 3 hours to be asked if I wanted a sleeping pill. Some don't ask male nurse made it his mission to increase the drug company's profits by insisting that I take some of his pills... he failed on both missions.

Day two: Thousands of dollars of more in tests while waiting for the doc to review first - I spend the day entertaining young nurses with enhanced stories of my mountain climbing and skydiving adventures:

2nd night:  This ancient nurse, at least 15-20 years younger than I, who looks to be not a day over 90, dressed like a unmade bed comes dragging her overweight bag of disjointed bones into the Medicaid cell assigned to me and some poor 75-year old that was so drugged he thought he was still home and kept yelling for his wife - but they keep pouring more pills into him. He retaliated by messing his diaper or peeing on his bed about every hour. Then the dusty rusty old RN that no doubt got her medical training in the Russian Army comes and stands at attention at my bed side. She barks in an loud East Europe accent " my name is Oona, I'm your nurse. I offered her my condolences. Either her batteries were dead or she didn't understand English or most likely didn't care what I said. She takes holds my hands, and like a mother trying to get her little boy to each spinach says, 

 "Here my dear, take these pills and you'll get well."  (In heaven or hell? I thought to myself)

"No!" says I. "I don't take pills until I know what they are for! And what are the adverse side effects?

She says, "this one is a blood thinner; this one is to help you sleep and this other one is for high blood pressure. You have to take them to get well ! she adds.

NO, I reply, "I've been taking blood thinners and I don't want to take any more until I or we can determine that they were not the cause of blood and near blindness in my left eye two weeks ago  or related to my passing out 3-days ago. As for the sleep pill, your departure and turning the lights off will do that. As for the high blood pressure pills - any guy caught between his 50 year old wife and his 50 year old out-of- work son moving back in with him for two weeks would have high blood pressure,and no pill will solve that problem." But she hears nothing, she is on a pill mission...

Oona  says, "TAKE IT! You only take 5 mg. of Warfarin, its a baby pill. I take 20 mg. every day!" 

 I say, "case dismissed, no pills!"

I unhooked myself, get dressed and checked myself out, missing another cold pancake breakfast, drove home to find a message on my machine that my primary care doc can see me at 10 am next week.

 AL Hayward