Cartoon Strip: Nota Bene by Leonardo No. 29 - Posedown! (Part 3 of 3)

This is the twenty-ninth installment of the Salem-News.com original series "Nota Bene by Leonardo" by Salem cartoonist Glen Bledsoe.

(SALEM) - This is the grudge match you've all been waiting for. Anyone can command an army, but can you drop seventy pounds of ugly fat in six months? It takes discipline, courage and a diet plan. Will President Brush defeat terrorist O'Llama bin Satan in the War of the Lean? Join hostess Opera Wintry (who was unable to find a substitute host for the occasion) as the representatives of the West and the East take to the stage for the battle of the cellulite. Turn off your cell phone, close the drapes and put out the cat. You won't want to be interrupted for Posedown!

Listen to what the experts from around the multiverse are saying about Nota Bene by Leonardo:

"Like you hardly hear about alternate earths in the regular newspapers." -- Tina Wilson, check out clerk at a major grocery store chain on Earth B12.

"When will Nota Bene do an article on Earth-Zool?" Tom Johnson, ruler of Earth-Zool.

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wahoo! news; February 18, 2007 4:21 am (Pacific time)

Flash!; US military to lower enlistees prior criminal record standard minimum allowable requirements to facilitate an increase in forces needed for current war effort! Now allowing felons with only two convictions not exceeding a total incarceration of seven years in any one period, qualifying Bush, Cheney, Rove, Libby, Armitage, Rice, Buchanan, Limbaugh, Coulter, O'reilly ,Rumsfeld and the entire FOX news sindicate, for recruit processing in Parris Island's reception facility conveniently located in South Carolina, just in time for the upcoming spring offensive! They were all last seen in a mini-van with tinted windows headed toward the Mexican border,the white House appears to be in Pelosi's hands!.,wahoo! news out.

more noise; February 16, 2007 5:45 pm (Pacific time)

the same orb in space on the same continent and coincidentally the same place called Texas, the window frame from the book depository in Dallas where an accused "terrorist- pinko- fag- junkie- Castro loving- Soviet trained- commie misfit" armed with a World War One bolt action rifle,(an Italian Carcano!,in a state awash in automatic weapons from Sam Houston's time till now!),took aim and assasinated president Kennedy and Gov. Connally in 1963, "they" say getting off three shots in less than five seconds at a moving target far enough away for me to know the story is a lie to cover the first and probably second rifle, anyway, this "frame" was auctioned for Three Million US dollars!,(as in 3,000,000 bucks!)over the internet by the owners of the building, touted as a "piece of history". I'd of called it something else.,but this Texas is the about the wierdest place I've ever heard of!

can't keep quiet; February 15, 2007 10:20 pm (Pacific time)

a group of alien invaders known as the FCC in lingua de earthling, have been approached by the powers that be in a corporate HQ located between Secret,Texas and Washington,D.C.,who have made a staggering connection audio- visual wise,and determined that something should be done to control violent scene content on television!, that marvel of technologcal delay!, as studies for the past fifty years have been totally ignored to the point of me thinking the Saudie Arabian-Taliban-Terrorist-Democracy-Freedom-Haters- Axis-of-Evil, (I love that one!) led attack on 9-11 should have targeted MGM or the like, thereby insuring that no innocent people would be lost!, and making an equally bold statement as well., and rendering the FCC.,?, (who are these guys?) unnecessary altogether. We have been are being programmed to accept killing each other for entertainment while praying over our food, in six minute segments, for the rest of your lives if we let them., but this is only rumored to occur on other more savage planets.,sorry to overeact.,but I can't keep quiet!

wahoo! news; February 15, 2007 4:28 am (Pacific time)

Flash; unbelievable as it sounds,in another world,(Leo, forgive me, I kniow this is nearly beyond the point of no return), but I'm not making this up! In a state clled New Mexico (near Texas),according to the A.P., the athorities are.,at $21.00 each, (as in twenty one dollars), to provide drinking emporiums with "talking urinal cakes", now get this, when urinated upon these little gems tell the urinist in a female voice if they have had too much alcohol to drive safely! I'm painfully serious! these things are battery operated and a life expectancy of three months according to manufacturers specs. I mean, wouldn't you want to be told this stuff or what?, it's in the news and I can't help myself! wahoo! out.

wahoo! news February 14, 2007 10:32 pm (Pacific time)

Flash! In yet another "Brushstroke" of genius, the administration of an amazingly distant galactic enterprise has decided to grant admission to 5,000 Iraqi's as "residents" who are now fleeing or already flown their own countries non-civil, non-sectarian war! Is Apr. 30th, 1975 in the picture? And what's more is that this alternate Brush has barked yet again these "weapons of detructive, pre-emptive, massive, insurgent, unacceptable, terrorist, pinko, fag, junkie, democrat, soviet influenced Chavezinistc Maost, anti-stemcell, cretinistic and harmful to our troops on the ground" as well, are coming from Iran this time! I'm laughing and crying! It must be lonely at the top to resort to "spider webbing", Iran!? How convenient! Beings how the troops are already there! I-ran? As in, what the draft dodging Bush, Rove, Limbaugh, Cheney, Condolleezza, O'reilly, Buchanan and Libby,a.k.a. the "Snow group", all did during Vietnam? Well, here's their effing chance to do their patriotic duty! They can always say, "I-Ran!". wahoo! news out.

Spock; February 14, 2007 4:21 am (Pacific time)

seeing Brushface was very reassuring,now I don't feel nearly so self conscious.I mustsay the choice of leadership in this era of primitive guilds on the earth zones is not based on logic.,but it's nice to know I don't need surgery to run for office and take over this system!., and chess will be required for citinsenhip! and Rubberface Universtiy would become a distant bad dream, only a meuseum with a few jars and Brushface won't be in one! Don't vote with your heart.,vote for me using logic! or esle they will rule and you will drool! Spock out.

JAFO; February 13, 2007 9:55 pm (Pacific time)

Leonardo.,if you look fast, the images of Brush occaisionally look like Ted Haggard and Mike Jones at the same time! They (you may remember), were involved in an altogether different story in another dimension.,off the charts now, but what an amazing likeness.By the way.,Where did Brush he get these steroids.,?

Mezzman February 13, 2007 9:19 pm (Pacific time)

I think the little bully used steroids, that's the way he wins things, by cheating.

DEA sattelite monitors; February 13, 2007 8:51 pm (Pacific time)

The dance card mr. Leonardo!, out with it!! give us your sources names, bank numbers and cell phone access., or face an Enduring Campaign we'll just call "Robust 1"!, first phase. Don't force us.,this story should not be allowed for underage viewers by the way.

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